prescriptions for betsisanders, to have a healthy, happy life ....

 

 

 

 

PRESCRIPTIONS FOR A HAPPY LIFE

I'm a dentist and I write prescriptions for medicines that alleviate pain and suffering. But I also write another kind of prescription... those that inspire, give meaning & inspiration to my life and therefore make me happier.

Symptoms:

In constant pain, both physical & emotional pain.Angry at user friendly frenemies.Sad, for wasting time, energy, even money on user friendly frenemies.

 

 

Prescription #1

Think happy thoughts.

Sig: Take three times daily, 24/7
 

“Some people are like slinkies --- not good for anything, but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.”This is funny, hilarious. Made me laugh out loud when I imagined my frenemies rolling the stairs. Mean? Yes. But I'm sure they think the same way too. That's how I feel about those people whom I have banished from my life, such user friendly, ungrateful fools. However, these are just thoughts, monstrous thoughts, harmless funny thoughts, which I can just laugh about. No further action is necessary. Feel the feeling and watch the thought. Such monstrous thoughts do not need a reward or a reprimand.  I can think of baking a cake, painting a landscape or pushing my frenemy down the stairs. Don't worry, they are just thoughts. So, if monstrous thoughts invade my tranquil mind, I'll just follow my thoughts. Very soon, these thoughts will disappear, or better still, i'll  think of happy thoughts to replace my monstrous thoughts. Each day, we have 40,ooo to 60,ooo thoughts and these thoughts that we have or indulge in, can make or break us. Remember, happy thoughts made Peter Pan fly =] .

Prescription #2

Live a life with intention.

Sig: QID (4 times daily)

Who wouldn't want to receive a brand new Jaguar sports car and a 4 - wheel drive Range Rover? This rich guy gave her partner, a movie actress, these two vehicles in just one week. What a lucky woman? Would I be happy to be gifted such luxury vehicles? What about owning the latest designer outfits, shoes or bags? I'm sure I'll be jumping for joy, feeling like I belong to the elite, rich and famous people. Or, wouldn't I feel very important to be invited to a celebrity's wedding, birthday bash, or house blessing. Eventually, act as one is  among affluent, influential, high society ladies who 'do lunch'.

Aside from material things,there are other things that can make a person 'happy', such as eating, drinking, smoking, even sex can give a person some kind of 'happiness'. This isn't happiness, this is satisfaction or self gratification, but not true happiness or joy. Do any of these really give meaning to one's life? If  we die today, what will people remember us by? The shoppaholic, bagaholic bitch? The party animal? The extravagant, flamboyant fool? the mistress, 'kabit' 'kept woman' ? or the idle, dull, dumb stay-at-home gossip girl?

 

What do we do? find meaning in what we do?  leave a mark? a legacy, give inspiration to people so they can live good lives. share  knowledge , time or even the little that one has to others in need.

We all die, sooner or later. We live in borrowed time. The happiest people are those who had left things better than the way they had found them. The happiest ones are 'givers' and not 'takers'... those who lived a life with intention, purpose, meaning. 



When you die, will you be missed? Will you leave anything behind, to serve as a good remembrance of your life? Will your legacy, your words of inspiration, become a guiding light for others to remember you by? Will you have no regrets, no unfinished business?

So........stop gossiping or indulging in idle, senseless unintelligent conversations. Stop identifying with material things or branding yourself as a shopaholic or a bagaholic, you are just telling the world how 'sick' you really are. Stop pretending to be other than who you are...

People know who is, who was and who will always be. No amount of 'pretense' can change the past, how I once lived, how I once was. I have been consistent.  I lived my life being extra nice to all of you.  If what I did wasn't enough, it is enough for me.  What matters is how I live now, how I look today, and what I have achieved on my own today. My paintings, my books, I will leave behind.  The truth is that I have lived my life helping others is more than enough.  I intend to live the rest of my life in peace and only with those who love me back, love me more and love me most.   
 

Prescription #3

Choose your company well.

Sig: Taken daily.

Amputate relationships that are heavy and weigh you down because user friendly, ungrateful, depressed, pretentious people will use up all your time and resources. I have banished such people in my life and now I have more time to spend with those people who matter to me. I have more time to work and fulfill my dreams. When these frenemies were around me, all I did was listen to them cry at night. They used up most of my time. Instead of painting, reading or writing, I'd have to listen to their sad stories, their never ending whining, their complaints, their insecurities,their financial problems, even problems with their in-laws.


I didn't just give them my time. I gave them free orthodontic treatment, free luncheons for their in-laws, free birthday parties, free swimming parties, free dental services for their families and friends, free birthday cakes, free pasta, pastries and cash. These frenemies accepted all my gifts and services. They practically lived in my house. I even took care of their kids, like a baby sitter. One  accepted my check but refused the checks of the other girls.

What do I get in return? nothing...I am the bad person. I gave until it hurt and no amount of 'backstabbing', 'rumor mongering' or 'character assassination' can change the fact that I have been used. Whose fault was it? Mine... because I made the wrong choices. But not anymore. I will forget the dull, dumb, loud, ungrateful, uncouth, uncaring, unappreciative, pretentious, user friendly, ugly (physically ugly), repulsive, hideous, liars, fiends!!! I choose to be with smart, honest, grateful, kind, sweet, caring, appreciative, intelligent and beautiful ladies From now on, I will choose my company very well.

 

Prescription # 4

Count your blessings

Sig: Take it at bedtime. About an hour

before going to bed, pray ... and when

you do, thank God for all the

blessings He has given.

I have always counted my blessings. In fact, I just didn't count them, I even shared my blessings with a lot of people, even frenemies, who actually benefitted more than my other friends and relatives.
 

Kindness begets kindness. Love begets love. Those frenemies are not around anymore to return the favors or the gifts, but, somehow my blessings abound, and they come from other people. Most of all, I know that God sees how I was kind and generous to everyone, and that is enough, more than enough. I gain graces in heaven. 
********

 

"No amount of backstabbing, character assassinations or rumor mongering can change anything. I was a very 'useful' friend and they were user friendly."/ betsisanders
 

Written on March 16, 2010 / 00:30 am... I just published this now, September 27, 2012.

 

The title of this painting is "Forgiveness". It is in my mother's bedroom.

Forgiveness is the Treatment to this ... my ailment. 

Learn to forgive and forget them. That's the only way to be free of pain, suffering, anger and sadness.

 

Live, love and be happy always. / betsisanders 2012

A Night for Friends Sept 17, 2012

I just love these ladies!  my bsbff's... beautiful sexy best friends forever

Thanks for helping me at the Registration!

... my alter ego,... Cynthia, a friend since 5th grade

... with Dr. R ... Thank you sir for a successful concert!!!!

with the dearest Hubby ....  Thanks B!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Hubby clowning around again.

with the nutty professor. Dr Cesbau :)

Hubby and Dr. Ned,  buddies forever.

the cHUNKS of 83 minus one

 

with the beautiful Chinese ladies of Class 83

 

The first photos were taken during the concert. 

 The last three photos were taken at the wake of Dr. Boy J. 

 

hope to see you all again sooooooon!!!

 love love love ,   betsisanders 2012

 

 

 

 

 

the mystery ...

Sunset taken at the Mall of Asia

 

"Whenever we solve the mystery or discover the tricks behind the magic, we lose the thrill and excitement in our lives."

I wrote this line months ago and was waiting for a nice photograph or painting to publish it with. I need to experience things before I can write or paint. Call it inspiration. Something has to trigger this surge of emotions so I can create.

The mystery behind death baffles me a lot. My preoccupation with it makes me write about it all the time. Death is comfortable. It ended the suffering of a colleague. That is all I know for sure. What lies beyond death is the mystery... I don't want to solve that mystery just yet. That's what makes my life challenging. I have to dream more in order to create. But once my life becomes difficult and unbearable, when pain and suffering is all there is to my life, when there is no more cure, then it is time to give up. I will let nature take care. I'll let it go and let God.

Goodbye classmate ... I'll make it up to you next time.

/ betsisanders 2012

Life is scarier than death. JSFoer / Death is comfortable. betsisanders

 

 

I was crying all night and it rained heavily the entire night that caused flooding in the Metro the day after. I have always referred to the rain as tears just like how JSFoer once wrote, “In bed that night I invented a special drain that would be underneath every pillow in New York, and would connect to the reservoir. Whenever people cried themselves to sleep, the tears would all go to the same place, and in the morning the weatherman could report if the water level of the Reservoir of Tears had gone up or down, and you could know if New York is in heavy boots.” ― Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

As I write this blog, a colleague, a classmate, Hubby's group mate in dental school, who is the beneficiary of our fundraiser at Strumms, is fighting for dear life. When I got the news that he flatlined for twenty minutes during his hemodialysis session the other night and is in a coma, I couldn't stop the tears. I am not even close to him. I even deleted him from my list of FB friends two years ago. ( FB didn't have the 'acquaintance' grouping then).

Being Ms. Emo and a cry-baby, the tears poured just as strongly as the rains that night. I emailed classmates and friends, asking them to storm the heavens with their prayer offerings. But my prayer was different. Not for him to get well, but for him to be comfortable, and when I say comfortable, I meant for him to die as soon as possible. It must be very tiring and draining for him. I was being drained of my emotions as I prayed for him.

If living is that difficult, if living entails being attached to life support systems, machines, tubes, monitors... That is not living!
I told my Hubby that if I would ever need hemodialysis or something as simple as an angioplasty, I wouldn't want to go through those procedures. He said that I should make a notarized document, so he won't be blamed for anything.

That kind of life is scary. My dad who is turning 83 this November has been in hemodialysis for the past eight years. He has survived most of his 'classmates' at the renal care center. Dad is a strong man, a fighter ... but he recently signed a DNR document, which I co- signed last time I visited him in Roseville. I guess, he must be tired too.

Dad's hemodialysis session was also stopped several times when his blood pressure became quite low. So every time he goes to those sessions, it could be his last. When I had to 'daddy- sit' two years ago, I would listen to him every morning, as he gets ready to be picked up by his transport service. I would hear him drag his walker, close the front door, his driver say 'good morning', then the van would drive away. I would wait for him to get back at around two in the afternoon, again hear the same things. It is his routine thrice a week for the past eight years.

I got a phone call from him this morning. He asked where I kept his leather hats. He said he needed them since it is going to be cold soon. "Autumn is a bit late." he said. He sounded 'happy', content, has accepted that he cannot come home to Manila. I was glad to hear his voice. But there is this lingering fear that maybe it could be his last phone call.

I don't want my Dad to be comfortable yet. I guess I could live with this fear for a few more years. But if it was me who has to live that kind of life. I would rather be comfortable as soon as I can.

Life is scarier than death. JSFoer / Death is comfortable. betsisanders

another fun friday with the travel 'mistresses'

Mistress means ....

1)(n.) A woman well skilled in anything, or having the mastery over it.
2)(n.) A title of courtesy formerly prefixed to the name of a woman, married or unmarried, but now superseded by the contracted forms, Mrs., for a married, and Miss, for an unmarried, woman.
3)(n.) The old name of the jack at bowls.
4)(n.) A woman having power, authority, or ownership; a woman who exercises authority, is chief, etc.; the female head of a family, a school, etc.
5)(n.) A woman regarded with love and devotion; she who has command over one's heart; a beloved object; a sweetheart.
6)(n.) A married woman; a wife.

Therefore, why does the word mistress  refer to just this meaning [7)(n.) A woman filling the place, but without the rights, of a wife; a concubine; a loose woman with whom one consorts habitually.] ???

********

Watched the movie "The Mistress" with the 'travel mistresses'.   I am Ms. Emo, a cry - baby, but this movie did not make me cry at all, even if I have PMS. I have watched all of  Lloydie's films and I do not like Derek but ,  I  like "The Other Woman" better than "The Mistress". 

The travel mistresses all wanted to get out of the theatre for varied reasons. Some were hungry, (especially me) , others needed the comfort room and in a hurry  to pick up the kids from school. But we just had to find out how the movie was going to end. How else can it end? It won't be a "lived happily ever after" ending, unless those two old people die. 

********

Dinner was here ......



... I'm sure you all know where this is. One of my favorite places to eat.

Saganaki... or flaming cheese.  OPA! / Php  250... we got two orders!

Roka Pasta / Php 450

Fried Eggplant Mezze / Php 100

 Watercress Salad / Php 450

 

Pacific Baby Squid / Php 120

Mussels / Php 155

travel mistresses at  CYMA.

( Malu, Stella & daughter left earlier)

 

********

Dessert ...... 

 

bananas foster / Php 155

la Christine / Php 155

Mango Hazelnut Au Chocolat / Php 185

 

... at La Creperia :) love this place! I will be back !!!

 

 

 

Brasserie Cicou / August 2012

Freshly Baked Bread

Salmon Carpaccio / Php 450

Nicoise (Single) / Php 300

Boudin Noir / Php 420

Pork Chop / Php 550

Bouillabaisse / Php490

 

Kouing Aman / Php 310 .... my favorite

Creme Brulee / Php 180

with Butch & Mayee

 

I really love Brasserie Cicou. I hope they have salted caramel macarons next time.  Will be back :)

(Sorry, I forgot to bring my Nikon and just used my phone to take photos.)

 

ATC ... "Age-ies" Ageless or Aged at the Town Center

Slideshow

ATC 'Age-ies' Ageless Aged at the Town Center

My friend Angge was in Manila for a week. It was her birthday the other day and I just had to see her before she goes back to Malaysia, where she is a professor in a dental school.We planned this get together a month ago.. Going to Alabang to be with Tinali was part of the plan.

I reserved at PF Chang but it was overrated daw :( so, we walked inside the mall and looked for a new place, one that isn't part of a chain, or one that isn't in eastwood. Wee Nam Kee daw, but I've been there several times na. There was this Vietnamese place .... Hmmmm, ayoko! John and Yoko, yoko rin! Then we saw Shi Lin. Tinali said they have xiao long bao. Magic words, xiao long bao!

While the five of us walked inside ATC, I couldn't help smile. Smile at these five aging friends. I wondered how the young people 'saw' us, if they noticed us at all. I kept on saying we were the Age-ies ( derived from the female singing group 'belters', yung sumisigaw while singing )... Wala Lang! Kakatuwa... Limang matanda naglalakad sa mall, nagmo-malling? Gumigimmick sa ATC?

On our long drive home, we were 'rating' the restaurant. I said, if Circles is a 5, then how would they rate Shi Lin. 3 daw. Another said 3.5 .... Huh? Ako 1.5 ..... Syempre, kontra si Cesbau with whatever I say.... It is his trademark, kontrabida... Para bang si Miriam Defensor, who btw, i find very amusing! So amusing ka ba Cesbau? Unlike LD.?

I am not writing a review of the food served, its value for money, si Cesbau naman nagbayad e! Shall I go back to Shi Lin? ..... with the 'Age-ies' ? Sure, only because I love these people. By myself? ...  :)

I like this very light sponge cake!